Battle of the Dips

So my stepdad, Rich, makes the best dip known to man. In fact, its so
good that it stirs within people their deepest and darkest desire to
“out-do” Rich’s dip. It makes the people who eat it so upset that they themselves
haven’t created something of such magnitude that they willingly
put their credibility on the line to compete against the “Famous
Cordery Dip”. The ingredients (or at least the ones that I guess,
since the recipe is a long-lasting family secret) are not even
complicated: its perfect blend of smoothness without being too
creamy is a result of milk and cream cheese, there is plenty of
green onion for color, and definitely a few pinches of salt.
Other than that, the ingredients mix into the oblivion of
deliciousness. Such simplicity drives people absolutely mad,
but for the rest of us, we happily enjoy eating it.

So anyway, my uncle decides that he will compete against Rich’s
“Famous Cordery Dip”. For days the family received harassing mass
text messages that said something like “be prepared for the
ultimate takedown of the FCD!” It became a huge production,
and everyone became anxious for the competition. My uncle arrived
with his version of the FCD, and after setting it beside Rich’s,
peeled back the aluminum to reveal what he believed to be the new
famous family dip. A family friend was blindfolded, handed a Bugle
heavy with each kind of dip, and voted for their favorite. The new
dip received a high score, but the FCD remains sturdily maintaining
its place as the family’s favorite.